Half Off Moron Sale

SO.... I sit here looking out my window at all of the rain coming down. Barely able to see the mountains rising in the distance covered by a shroud of thick clouds. I see the rain filling my front yard and the street beyond. Then it hits me, are morons like turkeys? Turkeys have to be kept under cover during heavy rains because they have been known to look up and drown. They are too stupid to close their mouths to keep the rain out. It is this thought that makes me wonder whether there are certain people standing outside right now. Are they looking up? I hope so, this town could definitely use a few less turkeys. If you care to know more about specific morons of this town stay tuned, I will be profiling our towns morons and there idiotic acts in the following weeks.

MORONS

We should have a moron quota in this city. Ususally there is a village idiot. However, we seem to have an entire colony of idiots. This would be fine if they were contained to some sort of petting zoo but this is not the case. They are allowed to roam freely around our town and post all sorts of stupid shit. Perhaps we need a Moron Wrangler. They would have the job of going around town and putting any loose morons into rehab. The moron rehab center would be fully staffed with people who actually care about their fellow residents. Morons would be taught how to do constructive things for their community such as giving thanks to hard working city staff, finding a way to give children of this town more to do with their playtime and how to put things on the kiosk that will help and not hurt anyone.

Attack of the Lemmings

Isn't it funny when people talk about free thinking and individual rights and yet act as one? We have a group of folks in this very town who think that they speak for the majority. Unfortunately, they only speak for the small group of lemmings which follow their every move. How sad is that? We should put together a fund for the NoBo Lemmings. It could include help with posting comments that actually help the community, lessons on proper use of photoshop and a self-help workshop for proper humanity.

Leave Our Town Alone

WHY???? Why must you constantly put people down? The same people who do so many good things for this town. You obviously have too much free time if this is how you act in a constructive matter. By constructive I mean destructive of course, but then what do you care. You and your worthless friends think you can take some sort of perverse pleasure from making other people feel like shit. Wow! If you care so much about this town then how about getting your fat fucking ass away from the computer and do something for your community.
OH WAIT!! That's not possible! You and your kind don't do anything for this town. You sit at home and come up with ways to make fun of people. That is so admirable, you go girl. Everytime you post a flier or a rude comment you make yourself a little dumber. My hope is that you will post enough items to forget something important like breathing. Then the world will be at a loss for morons. Just kidding, the rest of your lemmings will make up for that just fine.